The Person Who’s Making Me Miserable

100% Of The Time (And No, It’s Not Me)

She’s the one who’s making me miserable – at least, that’s how it appears. We’re in the car when she starts up the conversation that’s guaranteed to press all my buttons and I feel the anger rising. “Here we go again!” I want her to stop, I want this moment to be different, I want her to be different. I become tense, frustrated, I don’t want to be there with her in the car.

If you’ve done any form of personal development, you’re probably already saying to yourself: “Well, no, SHE can’t be making you miserable. That’s not possible. It might seem that way, but no-one else can MAKE you feel anything.”

It’s a sensible perspective. But does that mean I’m the one making me miserable?

I don’t think that’s the full story. Because what I’ve come to realise is that in any stressful situation with a family member or partner, there is actually a third person present. We’re so accustomed to this person being there, we may not even realise what’s happening when they show up.

This person is the one who’s making me miserable – and making you miserable – 100% of the time. Without fail, they’re the one causing the anger, sadness, disappointment or frustration.

In this 3-minute video, I’m shining a light on who this person is, why they’re the cause of our suffering, and a first step we can take to deal with them. Once you start dealing with this person, your important relationships can radically improve.

Watch now: 

Easier said than done?

Each short video and article on this website is a starting point. But finding deep peace in your relationships is a daily practice. It’s about dealing skilfully with the mind that blocks connection. It’s about lovingly and painstakingly questioning every thought that blames and separates – so that you can be who you most want to be with the ones you most (want to) love.

If you want to become skilful in your important relationships, check out one-to-one support options.

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